myself
i got myself some new clothes today! and i'm excited to get them and wear them because i got myself some new skirts and a new dress, and i don't usually wear things like that. i don't think i own a single skirt and probably haven't since i was a teenager
i feel torn on the whole thing, though - on the one hand, i want to feel pretty and wearing skirts and dresses instead of sweatpants for once will do that. on the other, i've never felt really attached to femininity or that i connect to it completely! like, i know i'm a girl, but i don't like that i can only feel pretty when i actively make an effort to look like one or to follow those customs and i wonder if trying not to feel like that or not limiting myself to that specific gender identity would make me feel that way (content, happy in my appearance) in some other form
i'm going to wear the dress and the skirts and push myself outside of the comfort zone i've always known but i wonder whether i could do more to find myself